HANDLING ARROGANCE

I had just finished my session on “ Interpersonal Skills “ to students of MBA , when one of the smartest boys whom I had seen anchoring programmes, approached me with a question and asked,” Sir, I want you to help me out to handle arrogance. I feel I am quite arrogant with my friends and others too.” Now handling a question like this when you are surrounded by many more students becomes a bit difficult. I told him that since he was a student who because of his talents appeared to be always in the limelight would naturally develop arrogance which could be the result of feelings of superiority that people around him had given. I told him that it would go with time and he should not bother much. But our friend insisted because he was quite upset with himself and expressed that he had troubled his parents too due to this arrogance.And I found tears in his eyes. Obviously as a person whom students looked at as an experienced person and who has been accepted as a mentor by some, I did not have an alternative but to answer his question. I started thinking. I too was facing similar situation as I had found myself too behaving pretty arrogant on occasions. I was myself not able to get the answer. And then suddenly as I have often experienced while writing poetry or some thoughts I received an answer God knows, from where, perhaps HE only sent, which appeared Ok. I found myself answering,” Look boy, whenever you find yourself getting arrogant with someone; try to look at something in him in which he would be better than you. It could be anything- a quality or a possession- anything… obviously, you find him/her better in that instance and the moment you feel like this you may find your arrogance diluted a bit. I think I too need to experiment this with you,” I found him looking at me with surprise. “ It’s OK, we will try this and share next time,” I said and moved ahead. Trust me I am finding this small exercise useful. I have always found the other person better than me in some respect.. may be his height, his face, his clothes, his demeanour, his polish or some other thing and that has helped me become a little more respectful and kept me humble at times.