The train screeched to a halt as herds of people alighted and converged from all sides on the only water tap to fill empty water bottles, cans, glasses or whatever good enough to hold some water. It was scorching hot and one had to bear with it while traveling during summer vacations.
Because of the scheduled brief halt , the competition to fetch water became intense as the moments ticked by . And then the things turned sour. A middle aged tough looking man slapped a young boy. It was disgusting to see such blatant display of aggression. Some polite people intervened and the fight ended. But it left a bitter feeling in my mind about that middle aged man.
As the train whistled, he entered our compartment and while moving towards us he stumbled over a piece of baggage lying in the middle. A few people helped him to get up and the man sitting next to me whispered almost in my ears, “He is blind.” The bitter feeling vanished instantly.
After sometime he came over to us and expressed his desire to meet my children whose clamor had attracted him. After polite introductions, when my little daughter, about two years at that time, held his left hand, he took out a colourful balloon with the right from his pocket. He blew it and gifted it to my daughter. My son persisted for one for him and was able to get it. The man was generous and large hearted. I thanked him for the gifts to my little-ones. My heart was filled with compassion for him. But a question had remained unanswered. So I asked ,”Tell me Baba, why did you slap the young boy?” I could clearly notice the pain in his voice as he replied, “Yes, in fact, I didn’t want to do it. But the boy had touched my self-respect by saying – Andha hai kya – and I lost control.” I just looked at him and couldn’t speak anything further.
After a while looking at the blank space he moved ahead and called out, “Any little angels here?” He still had some balloons left in his pocket. And I felt sad over my first impression about him. This is what perception does. We tend to judge things as we see them based on our preconceived notions. But my perception about him had changed with in no time from bitterness to compassion to respect.. Thank God! First impression was not the last impression. I had learnt a lesson.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Friday, March 12, 2010
We Walk Far.....
Recently read the book I AM ANOTHER YOU by MS. PRIYA KUMAR, the noted trainer who also got featured in Rahul Dulhaniya.. on NDTV Imagine and then wrote to her giving feedback on the book which is very well written and deserves to be read by all the discerning minds..
Purpose of writing here is to share some wonderful lines she wrote to me in her response, I think these need to reach maximum people..
WE WALK FAR
AND EACH HILL WE CLIMB
SHOWS HOW FAR
THERE IS STILL TO GO
WE LEARN MUCH
AND THE LEARNING ITSELF
SHOWS HOWMUCH MORE
THERE IS TO KNOW..
Beautiful and inspiring lines these!
Purpose of writing here is to share some wonderful lines she wrote to me in her response, I think these need to reach maximum people..
WE WALK FAR
AND EACH HILL WE CLIMB
SHOWS HOW FAR
THERE IS STILL TO GO
WE LEARN MUCH
AND THE LEARNING ITSELF
SHOWS HOWMUCH MORE
THERE IS TO KNOW..
Beautiful and inspiring lines these!
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Monday, March 8, 2010
Happiness?
As a Child When I was asked
“ Are you Happy?”
I had thought…
…Papa brought sweets for me
Mother forgave my misadventures,
Sisters did my home work, dressed me up
Combed my hair,
and sent me out to play
And I had answered, “ Yes, I am Happy’.
As an adolescent when I was asked
“ Are you Happy?”
I was excited…
..Lots of freedom to wander around,
Someone special who felt concerned
Lots of dreams in my gleaming eyes,
A few handshakes with success
Everything looked fine ,
So I had said , “Yes I am Happy”.
As an adult When I was asked
“ Are you Happy?”
I had wondered…
..All those fake friends around
Invisible stabbings at my back
Most people indifferent
Perpetually weakening social fiber,
Unreal faces , false smiles,
I got confused and didn’t answer
After many years in to adulthood
Today when I am asked
“ Are you Happy?”
I don’t have to think
For, now I know Happiness lies inside me
It’s accepting contradictions with humility
It’s my positive reactions to things around,
It's a way to live,
It’s purely my own state of mind
I answer, “Yes, I am truly Happy.”
And I know I am. And it’s here to stay………
“ Are you Happy?”
I had thought…
…Papa brought sweets for me
Mother forgave my misadventures,
Sisters did my home work, dressed me up
Combed my hair,
and sent me out to play
And I had answered, “ Yes, I am Happy’.
As an adolescent when I was asked
“ Are you Happy?”
I was excited…
..Lots of freedom to wander around,
Someone special who felt concerned
Lots of dreams in my gleaming eyes,
A few handshakes with success
Everything looked fine ,
So I had said , “Yes I am Happy”.
As an adult When I was asked
“ Are you Happy?”
I had wondered…
..All those fake friends around
Invisible stabbings at my back
Most people indifferent
Perpetually weakening social fiber,
Unreal faces , false smiles,
I got confused and didn’t answer
After many years in to adulthood
Today when I am asked
“ Are you Happy?”
I don’t have to think
For, now I know Happiness lies inside me
It’s accepting contradictions with humility
It’s my positive reactions to things around,
It's a way to live,
It’s purely my own state of mind
I answer, “Yes, I am truly Happy.”
And I know I am. And it’s here to stay………
Friday, March 5, 2010
LET US PRACTICE HAPPINESS
I will be 50 in another couple of weeks. With the way the things had been happening I thought it was time to take a stock of things around and look at the possibility of taking corrective actions so as to bring back the kind of life I lived during the years between 1992 till 2005. That was the time when I had taken certain deliberate decisions and made special efforts to create a better and happier life for myself and for those around me. I think at that time I was practicing happiness. Come what may, each day would begin with morning meditation and a chat with the rising sun. It will end with my eyes looking at the night sky filled with stars wondering if ever moon would visit me sometime. I think, I was truly living in a state of bliss.
But then, life suddenly took a turn.. Three road accidents, hypertension, heart problem, typhoid etc. – every year saw me getting acquainted with my body a little more closely.. A difficult time that when the person who would often show the path to others found himself groping in dark! Happiness became like a friend living in distant place who would call up to say 'Hello' on occasions. My books, companions for years, turned in to sources of information instead of inspiration. Picture of confidence lost its shine and it was dust of fear & doubt that covered it. Yet I wasn’t able to accept the reality. For me the world was wrong and there were conspiracies all around. People were trying to destroy me. I followed the age old adage –talent must pay the price - and since I considered myself talented I too was being made to pay the price or so I thought. I didn’t realize at that time that everyone was busy fighting their own battles and hardly had any time to indulge or get involved in my life.
And then as always happens – a sudden revelation! I wasn’t enjoying life. I was deteriorating. I had to go back to my own ‘State of Bliss’ where I had stayed for many years before migrating to this current ‘State of Negativity’. I took a short break so that I would be able to introspect and have a journey in to my own inner space which I had seen from outside during my Angiography. I restarted reading books with greater intensity which once again turned in to sources of inspiration and not only information. I Am Another You, Change Every Thing When Every Thing Changes, Outliers, The Professional, Go Kiss the World, The Dolphin , Peaks and Valleys, One Minute Apology, Blink, What the Dog Saw , The Secret, Beyond the Secret, Eat-Pray and Love, I Have Lived for Thousand Years, The Power of Intention etc. etc. – I read and read and read. And suddenly the things started becoming clearer. I began to jot down each and every learning with a fresh perspective.
Basically, I was not able to handle people well as perhaps I was not able to understand the dynamics involved in working relationships which had this tendency to change with any change in the surroundings. I was often having difficulties in interpersonal relationship having fallen in the trap of ‘I AM OK YOU ARE NOT OK’ mode of behavior. And therefore my focus for learning had been to accept people as they were without expecting anything in return. This change alone would bring back those beautiful days.
And as I continued with my efforts, I learnt that in any given moment each person is compelled to act and behave as per his or her own level of understanding developed over the years of living based on his or her circumstances. So nobody in that sense can be wrong. A person could give me only that what he had. I learnt that I must refrain from passing judgments or evaluating people / events. Perhaps, the only major source of unhappiness, that ! I learnt that what I needed to do was to look at myself and adjust my own behavior to ensure that I did not fly off the handle often and to try and keep myself under control.
Easier said than done! Reacting to people and events had become second nature. Exactly opposite to what I had seen of myself in those twelve happy years when I was experiencing all that is written in “The Secret” , a book that has the magical powers to change destinies. But then I had to achieve what I had set out for. I needed to have some Mantra that would keep me on track that would make me attain happiness on a continuum.
As they say if you want something with great intensity, you attract it in your life. I was sitting and wondering when suddenly like a flash a few thoughts got interlinked and manifested themselves in such a way that I got my path, my Mantra. I don’t know why and how I recalled having read a book very many years ago in which the hero of the book a business tycoon keeps visiting countries cruising in his yacht . At one particular place as his yacht moves away from the shore he looks at the City as it starts fading away in the horizon and says, “ Yet another place that could not hold me”. I started thinking. If not places, I visit moments through which people, events, happenings, things, places etc. get manifested and based on what is experienced I feel happy, sad, bad or mad, whatever. So can I hereafter start practicing happiness and create many more moments when I should be able to say, ‘In spite of carrying negativity on its shoulders, the moment gone by failed to upset me in any manner. Wow! Thank you, God!’ And it appeared to be a good way of giving oneself strokes for positive behavior even if one finds oneself in an uncomfortable situation. I have started practicing this Mantra with some heartening results. Situations would arise when otherwise I would have reacted extremely aggressively straining my vocal cords, but nothing of that sort happens because I make deliberate effort to practice happiness. Hence I have learnt to stop myself at red light with patience, take a pause at yellow and move on when green with a smile. It feels very good whenever I find myself repeating the sentence, ‘In spite of carrying negativity on its shoulders, the moment gone by failed to upset me in any manner. Wow! Thank you, God!’ Oh, what a bliss! Any repetition of this sentence gives me joy and pleasure.
Well, join me and we shall together practice happiness.
But then, life suddenly took a turn.. Three road accidents, hypertension, heart problem, typhoid etc. – every year saw me getting acquainted with my body a little more closely.. A difficult time that when the person who would often show the path to others found himself groping in dark! Happiness became like a friend living in distant place who would call up to say 'Hello' on occasions. My books, companions for years, turned in to sources of information instead of inspiration. Picture of confidence lost its shine and it was dust of fear & doubt that covered it. Yet I wasn’t able to accept the reality. For me the world was wrong and there were conspiracies all around. People were trying to destroy me. I followed the age old adage –talent must pay the price - and since I considered myself talented I too was being made to pay the price or so I thought. I didn’t realize at that time that everyone was busy fighting their own battles and hardly had any time to indulge or get involved in my life.
And then as always happens – a sudden revelation! I wasn’t enjoying life. I was deteriorating. I had to go back to my own ‘State of Bliss’ where I had stayed for many years before migrating to this current ‘State of Negativity’. I took a short break so that I would be able to introspect and have a journey in to my own inner space which I had seen from outside during my Angiography. I restarted reading books with greater intensity which once again turned in to sources of inspiration and not only information. I Am Another You, Change Every Thing When Every Thing Changes, Outliers, The Professional, Go Kiss the World, The Dolphin , Peaks and Valleys, One Minute Apology, Blink, What the Dog Saw , The Secret, Beyond the Secret, Eat-Pray and Love, I Have Lived for Thousand Years, The Power of Intention etc. etc. – I read and read and read. And suddenly the things started becoming clearer. I began to jot down each and every learning with a fresh perspective.
Basically, I was not able to handle people well as perhaps I was not able to understand the dynamics involved in working relationships which had this tendency to change with any change in the surroundings. I was often having difficulties in interpersonal relationship having fallen in the trap of ‘I AM OK YOU ARE NOT OK’ mode of behavior. And therefore my focus for learning had been to accept people as they were without expecting anything in return. This change alone would bring back those beautiful days.
And as I continued with my efforts, I learnt that in any given moment each person is compelled to act and behave as per his or her own level of understanding developed over the years of living based on his or her circumstances. So nobody in that sense can be wrong. A person could give me only that what he had. I learnt that I must refrain from passing judgments or evaluating people / events. Perhaps, the only major source of unhappiness, that ! I learnt that what I needed to do was to look at myself and adjust my own behavior to ensure that I did not fly off the handle often and to try and keep myself under control.
Easier said than done! Reacting to people and events had become second nature. Exactly opposite to what I had seen of myself in those twelve happy years when I was experiencing all that is written in “The Secret” , a book that has the magical powers to change destinies. But then I had to achieve what I had set out for. I needed to have some Mantra that would keep me on track that would make me attain happiness on a continuum.
As they say if you want something with great intensity, you attract it in your life. I was sitting and wondering when suddenly like a flash a few thoughts got interlinked and manifested themselves in such a way that I got my path, my Mantra. I don’t know why and how I recalled having read a book very many years ago in which the hero of the book a business tycoon keeps visiting countries cruising in his yacht . At one particular place as his yacht moves away from the shore he looks at the City as it starts fading away in the horizon and says, “ Yet another place that could not hold me”. I started thinking. If not places, I visit moments through which people, events, happenings, things, places etc. get manifested and based on what is experienced I feel happy, sad, bad or mad, whatever. So can I hereafter start practicing happiness and create many more moments when I should be able to say, ‘In spite of carrying negativity on its shoulders, the moment gone by failed to upset me in any manner. Wow! Thank you, God!’ And it appeared to be a good way of giving oneself strokes for positive behavior even if one finds oneself in an uncomfortable situation. I have started practicing this Mantra with some heartening results. Situations would arise when otherwise I would have reacted extremely aggressively straining my vocal cords, but nothing of that sort happens because I make deliberate effort to practice happiness. Hence I have learnt to stop myself at red light with patience, take a pause at yellow and move on when green with a smile. It feels very good whenever I find myself repeating the sentence, ‘In spite of carrying negativity on its shoulders, the moment gone by failed to upset me in any manner. Wow! Thank you, God!’ Oh, what a bliss! Any repetition of this sentence gives me joy and pleasure.
Well, join me and we shall together practice happiness.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Learning From My Own Teaching...
It's almost a month haven't put anything on my blog. Somehow wasn't really aligned with the present as what needed to be done for having a future that would help satisfy my creative curiosity was all that my mind was focused on. A sudden surge in Sugar levels in my body had also become a cause of concern and after fluctuating like sensex for few days, finally it is coming back to acceptable levels but then I would have to be cautious with my diet. Well, doesn't matter, it will be alright. Coming to the reason for blogging today is to share with you something that made me rethink about my own approach. My own teaching came back to make me learn something I trully needed under my present circumstances.
It was last Friday when I got a message in my office that a visitor had enquired about me in our Guest House. Some executives from one of the renowned companies were on a visit to our plant where I am placed and one among the team had asked if I were still with the organisation and if it would be convenient to meet with him during the day. Well, wondering about the gentleman as I couldn't recollect having met him, I proposed to have a lunch meeting in our Guest House which for some reasons couldn't happen. And about 1400 hrs I found a young tall man smartly attired seeking my permission to enter my room. Realising that it must be the same gentleman, I received him and reading a big question mark on my face he said, " Sir, I know you are not able to recognise me, but let me tell you .. I was among the six candidates you had picked up from Sangli in Campus Interviews and then we had visited your plant for final interviews which I wasn't able to clear......", " Oh, I am not really able to place you exactly....," I interrupted. " Sir, let me finish and then my purpose of meeting you would be clear..Sir, that evening you interacted with us and as young freshers you told us a few things which have remained with me forever and helped me shape my career. Let me remind you what you told us.. If you are not able to change some circumstances, change yourself... there is somthing in you that is not helping you bring the change .. so efforts wil be futile.. look at yourself and change whatever needs to be changed in you to meet with success. Trust me, this is one thing that I have always kept with me and implemented in my career. I have never let it go... I spent four years in Detroit after doing my M. Tech and I am today well placed ..", he named his company which is indeed one of the most repected in the country. I was looking at him.. surprised... for RK was talking about something that had happened Sixteen years ago . Oh, my God, he had kept me alive in a corner of his heart for so many years and was sitting in front of me. He continued "Sir, actually you told us about Six Thinking Hats also...". And I recalled about what Edward De Bono had taught the world many years ago..
And we continued to chat for some more time. I thanked him for his kindness and confessed that it was so nice of him to have come as a messenger of God to let me relearn from my own teachings of the past which I had myself forgotten. And RK was spontaneous with concern in his voice , " No sir, you can't let that happen.. we have moved in career because you taught us.. and how can you lose your confidence... no sir, don't let that happen to you." RK had given me something that I needed. Circle had got completed. He had unknowingly come to meet me at a time when perhaps I needed him most. His words have left me emboldened ..I had lost my way, when I suddenly found my path. World is a beautiful place to live because we have people like RK who in spite of having touched the skies, continue to keep thier feet on Earth. I salute your humility , RK, Thanks a lot!
It was last Friday when I got a message in my office that a visitor had enquired about me in our Guest House. Some executives from one of the renowned companies were on a visit to our plant where I am placed and one among the team had asked if I were still with the organisation and if it would be convenient to meet with him during the day. Well, wondering about the gentleman as I couldn't recollect having met him, I proposed to have a lunch meeting in our Guest House which for some reasons couldn't happen. And about 1400 hrs I found a young tall man smartly attired seeking my permission to enter my room. Realising that it must be the same gentleman, I received him and reading a big question mark on my face he said, " Sir, I know you are not able to recognise me, but let me tell you .. I was among the six candidates you had picked up from Sangli in Campus Interviews and then we had visited your plant for final interviews which I wasn't able to clear......", " Oh, I am not really able to place you exactly....," I interrupted. " Sir, let me finish and then my purpose of meeting you would be clear..Sir, that evening you interacted with us and as young freshers you told us a few things which have remained with me forever and helped me shape my career. Let me remind you what you told us.. If you are not able to change some circumstances, change yourself... there is somthing in you that is not helping you bring the change .. so efforts wil be futile.. look at yourself and change whatever needs to be changed in you to meet with success. Trust me, this is one thing that I have always kept with me and implemented in my career. I have never let it go... I spent four years in Detroit after doing my M. Tech and I am today well placed ..", he named his company which is indeed one of the most repected in the country. I was looking at him.. surprised... for RK was talking about something that had happened Sixteen years ago . Oh, my God, he had kept me alive in a corner of his heart for so many years and was sitting in front of me. He continued "Sir, actually you told us about Six Thinking Hats also...". And I recalled about what Edward De Bono had taught the world many years ago..
And we continued to chat for some more time. I thanked him for his kindness and confessed that it was so nice of him to have come as a messenger of God to let me relearn from my own teachings of the past which I had myself forgotten. And RK was spontaneous with concern in his voice , " No sir, you can't let that happen.. we have moved in career because you taught us.. and how can you lose your confidence... no sir, don't let that happen to you." RK had given me something that I needed. Circle had got completed. He had unknowingly come to meet me at a time when perhaps I needed him most. His words have left me emboldened ..I had lost my way, when I suddenly found my path. World is a beautiful place to live because we have people like RK who in spite of having touched the skies, continue to keep thier feet on Earth. I salute your humility , RK, Thanks a lot!
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