Thursday, May 24, 2012

He Glows..


Written for Rebecca's Haiku My Heart...



Also for Leo's Haiku Heights : Joy




My humble attempt in telling a haiku story in
5-7-5, 3-5-3, 2-3-2, 1-2-1
let me know if I have succeeded..


He Glows..


Musical footfalls;
she sits with her eyes closed
in the  jogging park.

*

Greener grass
shines under the sun;
he walks in..

*

Sunrays
wash her face
he glows..


*

Love;
eyes spill
Joy

RS:)

Thanks
to my friend from Switzerland
Claude LOPEZ-GINISTY
for translating in French..

Bruits de pas musicaux;
elle est assise, les yeux fermés
dans le parc de jogging.

*
L'herbe plus verte
brille sous le soleil;
il entre..

*
Les rayons du soleil
lavent son visage
il s'enflamme..

*
L'amour;
Les yeux répandent
la joie

****

30 comments:

  1. Pyara Dost,
    Suprabhatham!
    The sunshine and the glowing dewdrops on the grass,
    The twinkle in her eys,
    The love in his eyes,
    Make the moments really wonderful!

    Well writte, dost !Nice thoughts!
    Sasneham,
    Anu

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  2. Well written! I love the last one - eyes spill joy!!!

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  3. It's a very sweet love story, Ramesh!

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  4. This is a gorgeous way of telling the old 'boy meets girl' story in haiku.

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  5. Great!



    Bruits de pas musicaux;
    elle est assise, les yeux fermés
    dans le parc de jogging.

    *

    L'herbe plus verte
    brille sous le soleil;
    il entre..

    *

    Les rayons du soleil
    lavent son visage
    il s'enflamme..


    *

    L'amour;
    Les yeux répandent
    la joie

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  6. The visualization was a delight...

    What magical golden threads weaved into this beautiful silken fabric that smells of Love.

    Thank you sir.

    Regards
    RM

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  7. A sweet love story ~ Joyful words ~

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  8. Lovely take over the prompt and beautifully described :)

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  9. That's a real challenge, Ramesh! You did it! Great!

    Hank

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  10. Oh! Ramesh ji you made my day.... i feel so good after reading this set! Thank you so much

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  11. Behold he gloweth! This feels so spiritual and physical to me. Great haiku.

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  12. Oh the eyes spill joy for sure, Rameshji! Wonderful! :)

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  13. What can I say, you have just set a example for all of us at HH!, thank you sir!

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  14. Now you have gone and done it!!!!!!
    Really a joy!

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  15. Lovely story -- you introduce me to another form -- thank you, Ramesh!! Happy weekend. Joyous Heart

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  16. Sunrays wash her face !! Loved this one . Such a beautiful expression :-)

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  17. lovely images that create a whole scene. definitely a success.

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  18. every love filled word worth waiting for! thank you ramesh for the beauty of this fills me each time i read your haiku, over and over.

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  19. i like how you structured the smaller and smaller haiku...

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  20. Beautiful set.....I loved the smallest haiku in the set....tiny yet has powerful meaning!

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  21. Awesome set of haiku Ramesh. Great form, loved reading it. I think I am gonna try this form also :-)

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  22. Beautiful Sir, sun rays washing her skin was absolute delight. I am little occupied these days, so I am missing reading all my favorite blogs. Sorry for that and big thank you for writing this piece.

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  23. Hello Sir I am new to Haiku and after reading this one I am left in a trance and completely mesmerized...such beautiful writing,just adored it! Thank you! :)

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  24. "love:eyes spill joy"
    eyes SPILLING joy touched my heart bang on.
    such a lovely haiku Ramesh Ji :)

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